I Am Forever (What Kills Me #2) by Wynne Channing
Genre: Young Adult (Paranormal Romance)Expected Publishing Date: January 31, 2014
Publisher: Jet & Jack Press
Axelia fought an army of vampires and survived. Once fated as the destroyer of the vampire race, she is now welcomed into the immortal empire and revered as a god.
But instead of relishing her victory, she faces a dangerous new world and an empire at war. Axelia is thrust into the position of supreme vampire and caught in the crossfire of battle. To make matters worse, her role alienates Lucas, the one vampire that she trusts.
Her choices have brutal consequences and her power spawns evil enemies. And they know how to get to her — by hurting those whom she loves most.
Bestselling author Wynne Channing's highly-anticipated sequel to What Kills Me is another heart-pounding thrill ride filled with stunning twists, tragic betrayal and bloody action.
Axelia.
It was a whisper. A hiss.
Ax-eee-liaaa.
Louder. Raspy. From the corner of the room.
I sat up and blinked but saw only black.
Lucas?
It called my name again, this time from the foot of my bed. Oh my God. I froze.
“Who’s there?”
In the darkness something reached out and grabbed my leg, nails piercing my flesh. The agony shocked me. I screamed and struggled like an animal crushed in a steel trap.
It was neither vampire nor human. It was slimy, oozing blood and some other rancid liquid. I choked on the putrid stink of rotting meat.
I shrieked and kicked it in the face. The jagged edges of its fangs sliced my heel. I rolled sideways, fell from the bed, and hit the floor. My bloody feet slipped as I tried to skid away. But the creature was on me, snarling, dragging me by my feet toward its mouth. Then I saw its eyes.
Yellow. Filmy. Their black centers bleeding at the edges.
The creature snapped at my face.
“NO!”
I put my fingers in its mouth and it sank its teeth down to the bone. With a cry I tore its jaw off. It didn’t even scream, just reeled away. I scrambled back against a dresser, and a lamp smashed and fell to the ground. Still blind, I felt around until my hand closed around a shard of glass. I stood and the creature crashed into me, a storm of claws and teeth. As we slammed into the wall, it stabbed its talons into the back of my shoulders, the pain hot and intense. I drove the shard in between its ribs. We fell together.
Laughter. I heard a low, hoarse cackle and when I looked toward the sound, I saw eyes.
Blood red. And then they were gone.
The monster was shaking me. It was talking. No. It had Lucas’s voice.
Lucas.
Suddenly, there was light. Lucas was crouched over me and I was twisted under him, mid-struggle.
What? What’s going on?
“Zee! Stop!” Lucas shouted. “Stop. You’re all right.”
“Where is it?” I cried. “Where did it go?”
“Calm down. You were dreaming.”
“No, th-there was something in my room. Where is it?”
“You were having a nightmare, my lady,” Uther said. He clutched the belt of his robe, eyes wide. A row of soldiers stood beside him, their gloved hands on the handles of their swords.
“What...?” I blinked to clear the fog in my head.
Lucas rose and helped me to my feet. Then he staggered back. He had blood on his hands.
“Lucas, you’re bleeding!”
“I’m fine.”
I rubbed my eyes. “What happened?”
Wincing, Lucas lifted his shirt and seemed to yank at the skin on his abdomen; he threw a piece of glass to the ground.
The shard of glass. I put that in the monster. The monster is Lucas? No, wait.
“Oh my God,” I whispered. “Did I do that to you?”
“Yes.”
“In my sleep?”
“Yes.”
“I’m so sorry.”
“Don’t worry about it.”
“I swear, there was something in my room and then someone else who was watching. I heard them. I felt them.”
I reached around to rub my shoulder, searching for bloody punctures. No wound. I looked down at my rumpled dress, stained with sweat. I turned my hands over and searched for scratches. “There was something here. It was so real.”
A chunk of the bed frame had splintered off. Chairs and tables were overturned. One of the doors had come off its hinges. Water from the vase, now broken, dribbled from the table to the floor.
“Did I do all this?”
“You had some help,” Lucas said.
Uther nodded. “The swordsmith and the maids tried to wake you from your nightmare.”
Oh no. “Did...did I hurt them?”
“They will be all right,” Uther replied.
Under the light the confusion dissipated and guilt swept in. “I’m sorry,” I said. “Lucas, are you okay?”
“I’ve healed already, so don’t give it another thought.”
I put my hands up as if I was facing a squadron of armed officers. “Sorry, everyone.”
“Please leave us,” Uther ordered. The Aramatta filed out without a second glance.
I plucked a few feathers stuck to my clothing. A cushion had been gutted and its fluffy innards were strewn all over the bed and floor. Lucas placed a hand on my still trembling shoulder. His fingers touched where the creature had pierced me with its nails.
“You were stuck in a very bad dream, my lady,” Uther said.
“I’ve never had a nightmare like that before,” I said. “Usually I dream that I’m horribly late for a final exam and I can’t find the classroom. But there were monsters. One was attacking me and biting me and I couldn’t get away. It was so real.”
The creature’s fetid blood still lingered in my nose. It made me nauseous. I sank down onto the once-beautiful bed.
“You’ve also never been through the kind of trauma that you’ve experienced,” Uther said.
“I’m not making a good case for myself, am I? Being a house guest from hell.”
“My lady, the Monarchy is only concerned with your safety and well-being.”
“Thanks, Uther.”
“Try to get some rest, my lady.”
“Yeah, I’ve given up the whole sleeping thing. It’s overrated.”
“I will return shortly. If there is anything you need, just call for one of the maids.”
“I don’t know how eager they’ll be to come in here after what’s happened.”
“We are all here to serve,” Uther said with a bow before leaving.
“I’m not,” Lucas said. He sat on the bed beside me. “But apparently I’m here to be your pin cushion.”
“I’m so sorry.”
“I’m teasing you.”
I raked my fingers through my hair. “What happened?”
“You fell asleep while the cleric was trying to convince me to give you space. I refused and ended up resting on the couch in your room. Then you started sleepwalking and screaming.”
“I was standing up?”
“Yes, you threw a maid through the door.”
“Seriously?”
“Yes. And anyone who touched you.”
“Were my eyes open?”
“Yes.”
“Then what did you do?”
“I tried to wake you.”
“Then I stabbed you?”
“Well, you did that after.”
“After what?”
“After a struggle. Let’s just say that I learned very quickly that I could never fight you.”
I slapped my hands to my face. I wanted to fold into myself and disappear. I’m dangerous.
This is partly why the Monarchy hunted me in the first place. They feared that I would be out of control and murderous. The Empress would have something to say about this. Maybe this was enough proof that I could not be free.
“Don’t beat yourself up over this.” Lucas pulled my hands away from my face. “You’ve done enough beating up today,” he added with a wink.
“Seriously. I hit something so hard that my hand was sore.”
He slid his thumb into my palm and massaged my hand. “You’re all right?” he asked.
“Mmhmm,” I murmured.
I turned my hands to feel him trace my skin with his fingertips. He grazed the inside of my wrist and the pleasure radiated up my arm and into my core.
“Thanks for waking me up,” I said.
“Thanks for not killing me in your sleep.”
“That’s not even funny.”
“They have cameras in your room. You could probably ask to see the whole thing.”
“No, I’d rather pretend it didn’t happen. Hey...I didn’t...I didn’t pull off anyone’s lower jaw, did I?”
It was a whisper. A hiss.
Ax-eee-liaaa.
Louder. Raspy. From the corner of the room.
I sat up and blinked but saw only black.
Lucas?
It called my name again, this time from the foot of my bed. Oh my God. I froze.
“Who’s there?”
In the darkness something reached out and grabbed my leg, nails piercing my flesh. The agony shocked me. I screamed and struggled like an animal crushed in a steel trap.
It was neither vampire nor human. It was slimy, oozing blood and some other rancid liquid. I choked on the putrid stink of rotting meat.
I shrieked and kicked it in the face. The jagged edges of its fangs sliced my heel. I rolled sideways, fell from the bed, and hit the floor. My bloody feet slipped as I tried to skid away. But the creature was on me, snarling, dragging me by my feet toward its mouth. Then I saw its eyes.
Yellow. Filmy. Their black centers bleeding at the edges.
The creature snapped at my face.
“NO!”
I put my fingers in its mouth and it sank its teeth down to the bone. With a cry I tore its jaw off. It didn’t even scream, just reeled away. I scrambled back against a dresser, and a lamp smashed and fell to the ground. Still blind, I felt around until my hand closed around a shard of glass. I stood and the creature crashed into me, a storm of claws and teeth. As we slammed into the wall, it stabbed its talons into the back of my shoulders, the pain hot and intense. I drove the shard in between its ribs. We fell together.
Laughter. I heard a low, hoarse cackle and when I looked toward the sound, I saw eyes.
Blood red. And then they were gone.
The monster was shaking me. It was talking. No. It had Lucas’s voice.
Lucas.
Suddenly, there was light. Lucas was crouched over me and I was twisted under him, mid-struggle.
What? What’s going on?
“Zee! Stop!” Lucas shouted. “Stop. You’re all right.”
“Where is it?” I cried. “Where did it go?”
“Calm down. You were dreaming.”
“No, th-there was something in my room. Where is it?”
“You were having a nightmare, my lady,” Uther said. He clutched the belt of his robe, eyes wide. A row of soldiers stood beside him, their gloved hands on the handles of their swords.
“What...?” I blinked to clear the fog in my head.
Lucas rose and helped me to my feet. Then he staggered back. He had blood on his hands.
“Lucas, you’re bleeding!”
“I’m fine.”
I rubbed my eyes. “What happened?”
Wincing, Lucas lifted his shirt and seemed to yank at the skin on his abdomen; he threw a piece of glass to the ground.
The shard of glass. I put that in the monster. The monster is Lucas? No, wait.
“Oh my God,” I whispered. “Did I do that to you?”
“Yes.”
“In my sleep?”
“Yes.”
“I’m so sorry.”
“Don’t worry about it.”
“I swear, there was something in my room and then someone else who was watching. I heard them. I felt them.”
I reached around to rub my shoulder, searching for bloody punctures. No wound. I looked down at my rumpled dress, stained with sweat. I turned my hands over and searched for scratches. “There was something here. It was so real.”
A chunk of the bed frame had splintered off. Chairs and tables were overturned. One of the doors had come off its hinges. Water from the vase, now broken, dribbled from the table to the floor.
“Did I do all this?”
“You had some help,” Lucas said.
Uther nodded. “The swordsmith and the maids tried to wake you from your nightmare.”
Oh no. “Did...did I hurt them?”
“They will be all right,” Uther replied.
Under the light the confusion dissipated and guilt swept in. “I’m sorry,” I said. “Lucas, are you okay?”
“I’ve healed already, so don’t give it another thought.”
I put my hands up as if I was facing a squadron of armed officers. “Sorry, everyone.”
“Please leave us,” Uther ordered. The Aramatta filed out without a second glance.
I plucked a few feathers stuck to my clothing. A cushion had been gutted and its fluffy innards were strewn all over the bed and floor. Lucas placed a hand on my still trembling shoulder. His fingers touched where the creature had pierced me with its nails.
“You were stuck in a very bad dream, my lady,” Uther said.
“I’ve never had a nightmare like that before,” I said. “Usually I dream that I’m horribly late for a final exam and I can’t find the classroom. But there were monsters. One was attacking me and biting me and I couldn’t get away. It was so real.”
The creature’s fetid blood still lingered in my nose. It made me nauseous. I sank down onto the once-beautiful bed.
“You’ve also never been through the kind of trauma that you’ve experienced,” Uther said.
“I’m not making a good case for myself, am I? Being a house guest from hell.”
“My lady, the Monarchy is only concerned with your safety and well-being.”
“Thanks, Uther.”
“Try to get some rest, my lady.”
“Yeah, I’ve given up the whole sleeping thing. It’s overrated.”
“I will return shortly. If there is anything you need, just call for one of the maids.”
“I don’t know how eager they’ll be to come in here after what’s happened.”
“We are all here to serve,” Uther said with a bow before leaving.
“I’m not,” Lucas said. He sat on the bed beside me. “But apparently I’m here to be your pin cushion.”
“I’m so sorry.”
“I’m teasing you.”
I raked my fingers through my hair. “What happened?”
“You fell asleep while the cleric was trying to convince me to give you space. I refused and ended up resting on the couch in your room. Then you started sleepwalking and screaming.”
“I was standing up?”
“Yes, you threw a maid through the door.”
“Seriously?”
“Yes. And anyone who touched you.”
“Were my eyes open?”
“Yes.”
“Then what did you do?”
“I tried to wake you.”
“Then I stabbed you?”
“Well, you did that after.”
“After what?”
“After a struggle. Let’s just say that I learned very quickly that I could never fight you.”
I slapped my hands to my face. I wanted to fold into myself and disappear. I’m dangerous.
This is partly why the Monarchy hunted me in the first place. They feared that I would be out of control and murderous. The Empress would have something to say about this. Maybe this was enough proof that I could not be free.
“Don’t beat yourself up over this.” Lucas pulled my hands away from my face. “You’ve done enough beating up today,” he added with a wink.
“Seriously. I hit something so hard that my hand was sore.”
He slid his thumb into my palm and massaged my hand. “You’re all right?” he asked.
“Mmhmm,” I murmured.
I turned my hands to feel him trace my skin with his fingertips. He grazed the inside of my wrist and the pleasure radiated up my arm and into my core.
“Thanks for waking me up,” I said.
“Thanks for not killing me in your sleep.”
“That’s not even funny.”
“They have cameras in your room. You could probably ask to see the whole thing.”
“No, I’d rather pretend it didn’t happen. Hey...I didn’t...I didn’t pull off anyone’s lower jaw, did I?”
Five unanswered questions from What Kills Me
What the heck is Zee going to do now?
What Kills Me ended with a huge revelation that changed everything. First, she was public enemy number one, a fated destroyer, vampire apocalypse in a petite 17-year-old body. Now suddenly she is revered as maker, savior and deity. And she's not sure which scenario was better.
What will happen between Lucas and Zee?
I love the chemistry between these two characters. However, to be fair, they only met less than two weeks ago and were forced together by tragedy. That isn't the most romantic story. They basically ran from vampires, killed vampires and ran and killed some more. They don't have the most solid foundation to base a relationship — despite what the movies tell us. And so when the vampire Monarchy invites them into the palace at the beginning of I Am Forever, Lucas and Zee face a sticky situation. Lucas hates the Monarchy. He used to live with them and abhorred every minute of it. He also has every reason to distrust the Monarchy after they killed his sisters and father.
Zee, however, is inextricably connected with the Monarchy. They want her to be their icon. And there are vampires in the palace that she cares about. She doesn't want to abandon them so quickly and she is finally starting to feel comfortable as their supreme being.
That spells conflict for their relationship.
What's up with the rebellion?
The rebellion was introduced in What Kills Me through Samira, Lucas's ex-lover. As a rebel, she is fighting to overthrow the Monarchy. The Monarchy is all about rule and order which the rebels perceive as oppression. In I Am Forever, Zee becomes caught between the warring factions with each side trying to use her for their own gain.
Where did Lucas's brother, Taren, go?
When their father, Noel, left the palace, Lucas went with him and Taren stayed behind. He continued to train with the Aramatta and moved up — very high — in the ranks. You'll get to meet him.
Does she get to see her family or best friend again?
The Monarchy forbids contact between vampires and humans. And Zee was too busy running for her life to try to get back to her family. However, at the palace, the separation starts to wear on her and a terrifying event will endanger everyone that she holds dear.
To learn more about Wynne Channing and her books, visit her website, blog, and Goodread's page. You can also find her on Facebook and Twitter.
